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She said modern black women agonize over breaking male-female bonds forged in slavery and strengthened through the Jim Crow era."It may be even more of an issue for educated black women who have a sense of the historical realities of this country, where black women often were abused at the hands of white men," Craig-Henderson said.Jones remembered being troubled when a white man politely approached her around 1990.Black female-white male romance has become a hot topic in black-geared magazines and on Web sites, even hitting the big screen in movies like last year's "Something New."That film centers on an affluent black woman who falls for her white landscaper, a situation not unlikely as black women scale the corporate ladder, said Evia Moore, whose interracial marriage blog draws 1,000 visitors a day. She pointed to low rates of black men in college, a place where women of all races often meet their spouses.
"The rapist on the TV is the same as me."It's a frustration director Tim Alexander tackles in "Diary of a Tired Black Man," a frank film covering everything from black women's demeanors to their weight.
“I’m not saying that white men are the answer to all our problems,” Jones said.
“I’m just saying that they offer a different solution.” She reflects many black women frustrated as the field of marriageable black men narrows: They’re nearly seven times more likely to be incarcerated than white men and more than twice as likely to be unemployed.
She referred to a string of successful athletes with white partners, including golfer Tiger Woods."They normally rejected their culture and they went to the acceptable standard of success _ a white woman," said Handy-Kendy, who thought it ironic high-achieving black women were mimicking the behavior.
Back in Virginia, Jones feels life is too short to ponder race when it comes to love.
Her stance softened years later, after a sobering party experience."All the black men literally pushed (us) out the way to talk to the blondes," said Jones, who soon declared, "I'm going to date whoever."Black men and women have openly feuded before.